Feb.2nd,2009 Monday

I am sorry Xinxin that I couldn't save you.
This is the word we heard my father was talking to Xinxin on her Funeral. And today I read it on another NB's website. Tears can not help....It seems that every parent or grandparent are the same. When we see our kid or grand kid face death, we couldn't do anything and how we wish that we could be the one who is suffering...

It has been gone for just over three weeks now and it doesn’t seem real yet. My husband gets the habit to call me during the day time and the first word is:"how is Xinxin?" He asked the same questions and he answered by himself : you should be fine without Xinxin.

We try to keep ourselves somewhat busy during our Chinese New year holiday, but it doesn't make us miss her any less.
Xinxin came to his dream frequently, but only once to mine ---she was doing a scan without crying.
I asked Shuyuan what if Xinxin cannot recognise us or whether she will be same when we meet her again.

Hugs and kisses to my little Angel, we love you forever. Please continue the prayers.

I got a few phone calls from new NB family and it reminded me that the pain Xinxin had to go through.I recalled the time when Xinxin was diagnosed, I was angry with the doctors because they couldn't diagnosed earlier and I was mad at everyone who I met in the hospital.. It could be very difficult for these family.
My heart broke. I was reminded of the stress, the worry of having a child in cancer treatment. And the question why my kid is having cancer will be in the brain forever once for sure our kid had cancer .Every ache, every bruise, every complaint...Please continue to pray for all the children and their families who have cancer. There is no complete rest from the worry for them.

5 条评论:

匿名 说...


匿名 说...

Dear Parents of Xinxin,
Blessed are those who mourn for they will be comforted. May the comfort of our LORD Jesus Christ comfort you and may He give you the oil of gladness instead of mourning and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair. Xinxin is safe in the arms of Jesus and she would want to tell you how much she loves you and more so, how much Jesus loves you too. Paul & Li Leng.

Adriandy Manny 说...

You took the words right out of my mouth... I had the same feelings as you do. Even to this date, I still question "Why us? Why my son had cancer??". It's so true that even my son is in remission for a year, the "NB" word still works like a curse to us....

Peace be with you and Xinxin will always be remembered!

Jenn & Adrian


Sickness is not from God, but from the thief, Mr Sa Tan. He is here to destroy, steal and kill.

Praise the Lord that XinXin is in good hand now. It is just a temporary separation. You surely will meet her again in Heaven.

My father who was dead a year ago, Lord showed me he studying peacefully up there.

SLAM 说...

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